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The Sew What’s New Archive
This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and
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From: Aimee S
Date: 08-22-2003, 03:19 PM (1 of 12)
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My littlest boy is addicted to his Uncle B. When Uncle B comes over no one else exsist to him. My SIL uncle B's wife. stated that she could not understand why Nik loved his uncle B sooo much it is not like he is family. I asked not family he is your husband. MIL added well he is not blood. SHOCK Is that all that is needed to to have love is blood. I am closer to my Military Unit then to my own family. We only get together every few years to rehash fights no one knows why it was started. Anyone have adopted children?? It does not matter about blood does it?? Or is blood really thicker then water?? The more you disaprove, the more fun I am having!
http://photos.yahoo.com/aimeehs29 |
User: Aimee S
Member since: 02-23-2003 Total posts: 488 
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From: Chrysantha
Date: 08-22-2003, 04:22 PM (2 of 12)
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Sometimes 'family' is very hard to live with...I find it's often easier to 'like' (love ?) someone whos an 'outsider'. Family tends to nit pick and know too many of your faults, while 'others' see you as you are and take you as you come....you may always love your family, but not like them all the time...
Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414 
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From: jcook
Date: 08-25-2003, 12:35 PM (3 of 12)
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I think the person who coined the phrase, "Blood is thicker than water" may have been a family member about to be ousted by the others tired of their behavior. Seriously though, dealing with family members can be very trying, as many of us know all too well. Aimee, your son probably senses acceptance in his Uncle B. or maybe he is just more fun than the others. There is no reason why he should love a blood relative more than anyone else on earth unless they have earned his love! Hang in there and enjoy your military "family". Jill |
User: jcook
Member since: 08-16-2000 Total posts: 50 |
From: dmoses
Date: 08-25-2003, 02:39 PM (4 of 12)
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Aimee, There seems to be a little jealousy in the 'blood' family...  How does Uncle B feel about all of this? He must be a pretty good guy...and fun, too! Take care,
Donna |
User: dmoses
Member since: 02-22-2002 Total posts: 964 
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From: LeapFrog Libby
Date: 08-25-2003, 05:30 PM (5 of 12)
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Aimee, Let me tell you about my Mom and her sisters.. Big family , Mom was next to the youngest.. The very youngest had only 1 child and wanted more. So they adopted another son.. One of Mom's older sisters always treated this boy like a "red headed step-child" as the saying goes.. Mom and the other sisters would all chastize her for her behaviour, but it did no good.. Well, her favorite son finally married and guess what?? This couple could not have children.. So they had to adopt and they did.. A boy and a girl........ Talk about payback being H _ _ _ ... Mom and her sisters sure let the one sister know how they were all enjoying the fact that she had to eat all those ugly words she had said all those years... I would be glad my son has an uncle he really cares for and don't worry what the others say... Let the boy enjoy this relationship.. Personally , I think all relationships children can enjoy like this (extended family) helps them become more loving and understanding as adults..If you will, check out the people you know who have had loving Grandparents and those who did not know theirs... Don't you feel a coldness from the ones who had no extended family love...?? My family had wonderful gparents and my xH and xSIL did not and neither of them had any family love at all for relatives.. That is so sad... 
Sew With Love
Libby |
User: LeapFrog Libby
Member since: 05-01-2002 Total posts: 2022 
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From: mamahoogie
Date: 08-25-2003, 06:46 PM (6 of 12)
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The word family can take many forms, as well documented in this forum. My daughter's husband adopted her daughter - they exchanged father/daughter vows as part of the wedding ceremony - and the love they have for each other is so strong I forget sometimes he is not the biological father. In fact, his parents paid the attorney fees so he could legally adopt her and they just adore her too...and love her every much as the grandson born later. My parents, in spite of having 7 children of their own, took in foster children, one of them stayed for 30 years and although never adopted is as much my brother as the biological ones. I've had 10 foster children myself and they had the same rules and privleges as my own children. No other way to have it. As Ann Landers used to say "10 lashes with a wet noodle" to anyone who treats one child differently and makes them feel less loved and respected. 
I've decided to live forever - so far, so good.
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User: mamahoogie
Member since: 12-25-2002 Total posts: 461 |
From: brendalou
Date: 08-26-2003, 03:48 PM (7 of 12)
I was adopted when I was four months old, my aunt adoped two kids when they were less than 2 weeks old. I have over 65 cousins, and NOT ONE of them treats the three of us any differently than the other ones. My cousin adopted three kids; he married an older woman with kids, and he became a grandfather at 29!!! Talk about strange!   Family are the people who you make family -those you love - PERIOD!. Blood does NOT MATTER when it comes to love, cuz if it did, we would all be marrying our brother & sisters! (sick thought huh when you look at it from THAT perspective) Tell them all to outgrow the stupid, old thought; and just be happy that the uncle & nephew love and are loved, because that is what matters. -BrendaLou ==Brenda Lou
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User: brendalou
Member since: 10-07-2002 Total posts: 2 |
From: jennifer007
Date: 08-26-2003, 04:21 PM (8 of 12)
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Aimee, I was raised by my dad. He was not my biological father, but was my DAD! I didn't even know about it until I was 13 and meet my biological father when I was 18. I am very thankful that my dad raised me and did not think blood was thicker than water, he has been great to me and I would never think of him as anything but my Dad... His whole family thinks of me as there own. I was the first grandchild on there side and have been treated with that special status all my life. Eviedently the uncle does not feel the same way the aunt does, or your son would not have the attachment that he does. Kids are smart and tend to pick good adults out of the bad ones every time! Just my 2cents! Jennifer |
User: jennifer007
Member since: 05-22-2003 Total posts: 29 
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From: mamahoogie
Date: 08-26-2003, 06:26 PM (9 of 12)
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Right on!! Kids are great at picking the right people to love and their love is so unconditional, we could all learn from them!!
I've decided to live forever - so far, so good.
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User: mamahoogie
Member since: 12-25-2002 Total posts: 461 |
From: Dede
Date: 08-27-2003, 09:08 AM (10 of 12)
| In my book, love is like respect: it's something that has to be earned. Maybe that's why I'm a bit skeptical about love at first sight. And yes I agree, most kids come with radars when it comes to feelings. |
User: Dede
Member since: 03-23-2001 Total posts: 469 |
From: MaryW
Date: 08-31-2003, 11:55 AM (11 of 12)
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Family sometimes has nothing in common with love.
MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New |
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005 Total posts: 2542 
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From: Mother in Law
Date: 09-01-2003, 11:22 PM (12 of 12)
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Aimee, Think of it this way. You're not blood to your MIL......... but if it wouldn't have been for you, she wouldn't have that half of your son, her grandson. He'd be half of someone else and I bet she loves your son. One day your son is going to marry and if he marrys and has kids they too will be half of their wife's blood and so on and so on. Tell her as long as the love is felt for this man by your son who is she or anyone to second quess his feelings Most kids are right on when it comes to picking out good people Susie |
User: Mother in Law
Member since: Total posts: |
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