Sew What’s Up Presents
The Sew What’s New Archive
This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and
quilting message board “Sew What’s New,” which was
retired in August 2007. It is being provided by
“Sew What’s Up,”
which serves as the new home for many members of “Sew What’s New.”
From: Aimee S
Date: 07-08-2004, 01:51 AM (1 of 11)
|
There aren't too many TV shows that dare to tackle the topic of The Mother-In-Law. So, here are a few suggestions for new story lines for some of the current hit TV shows. 1. Oprah: Dr. Phil discusses the phenomenon of "Reverse Claustrophobia" (the uncontrollable desire to lock yourself in a room or closet when your MIL visits.) 2. House of Fashion: Today's topic - This Old Bag 3. Daughters-in-law and Order - Special Victims Unit: Investigators probe horrid offenses committed by MILs that have left the victims devastated, and destroyed lives. 4. Survivor: Stay at home and vote to keep the MILs on the island forever. 5. Home Shopping Club: DIL SURVIVAL KIT - Items for sale include a new lock and key for your front door, duct tape, caller ID boxes, and ear plugs. 6. MIL Family Feud: Most of us have been playing this game since we got engaged. Whenever you say something, your MIL tries to top it. 7. WWF: See the champ in the ring with your MIL. Can she go the distance? Dirty looks and snide comments won't knock out these tough opponents. 8. MIL Hunter : Go Down Under and watch as one man gets close to nature and risks getting his head bitten off by one of mankind's oldest and fiercest enemies. 9. Olympic Track and Field: Watch as ordinary men and women set new world records for speed while running away from their MILs. 10. Martha Stewart Holiday Special: Learn to set a beautiful holiday table, without a place for your MIL. It's a good thing. 11. Family Law: In this episode, a woman fights to divorce her MIL while remaining married to her dear husband. 12. Judging MIL: Why not? She judges you. 13. Who Wants To Be A Millionaire: The MIL who asks the most irritating question in the shortest time wins big bucks. 14. Frasier: Will Daphne marry Niles this season? If she does, at least she won't have to contend with a MIL. 15. Unsolved Mysteries - Missing MILs: MILs are disappearing all over the city. Does it surprise you that no one is looking for them? My MIL asked me, "If you hate me so much, why is my photo on the mantelpiece (the shelf above the open fireplace)?" I told her, "So as to keep the kids away from the fire." Behind every successful man stands a devoted wife and a surprised mother-in-law. 3/24 Adam and Eve were the happiest, and the luckiest, couple in the world, because neither of them had a mother-in-law. 3/24 Sometimes you cannot tell if a man is trying so hard to be a success to please his wife or to spite his mother-in-law. 3/24 Does it really surprise anyone that Mother-in-law's Day occurs less than one week before Halloween? 3/24 "My Mother-In-Law was bitten by a dog yesterday." "How is she now?" "She's fine, but the dog died." 3/24 My mother-in-law is a well balanced person. She's got a chip on BOTH shoulders. Q: How do you stop your MIL from drowning? A: Take your foot off her head. Q: What should you do if you see your Mother-In-Law rolling around in pain on the ground? A: Shoot her again. Q: What's the difference between a catfish and a MIL? A: One's a scum sucking bottom dweller, and the other one is a fish! I bought my MIL a chair for Christmas, but she wouldn't plug it in. George went on a vacation to the Middle East with most of his family, including his mother-in-law. During their vacation, and while they were visiting Jerusalem, George's mother-in-law died. With the death certificate in hand, George went to the American Consulate Office to make arrangements to send the body back to the States for proper burial. The Consul, after hearing of the death of the mother-in-law, told George, "My friend, the sending of a body back to the States for burial is very, very expensive. It could cost as much as $5,000 dollars." The Consul continued, "In most of these cases, the person responsible for the remains normally decides to bury the body here. This would only cost $150 dollars". George thinks for some time, and answers the Consul, "I don't care how much it will cost to send the body back. That's what I want to do." The Consul, after hearing this says, "You must have loved your mother-in-law very much, considering the difference in price between $5,000 and $150 dollars." "No, it's not that," says George. "You see, I know of a case many, many years ago of a person that was buried here in Jerusalem, and on the third day he was resurrected. Consequently, I do not want to take that chance! The more you disaprove, the more fun I am having!
http://photos.yahoo.com/aimeehs29 |
User: Aimee S
Member since: 02-23-2003 Total posts: 488 
|
From: DorothyL
Date: 07-08-2004, 07:27 AM (2 of 11)
|
Aimee, Are you trying to stir up Susie again? Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: Aimee S
Date: 07-08-2004, 10:36 AM (3 of 11)
|
Suzie is an exception to the rule... I will change the titile to MY MIL
The more you disaprove, the more fun I am having!
http://photos.yahoo.com/aimeehs29 |
User: Aimee S
Member since: 02-23-2003 Total posts: 488
|
From: MaryW
Date: 07-08-2004, 11:00 AM (4 of 11)
|
Mothers in law do have a bad reputation. I am one myself and try to stay as far away from my kids issues as possible. It works for me. But then, there are times when they think you are being distant.  but hey, they can't say I stick my nose in where it doesn't belong.They know where I am if they need me. MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New |
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005 Total posts: 2542 
|
From: plrlegal
Date: 07-08-2004, 12:36 PM (5 of 11)
|
My MIL is deceased but she was an angel and my dh's MIL he just ignores what she says. Patsy Patsy
|
User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
From: LeapFrog Libby
Date: 07-09-2004, 02:04 PM (6 of 11)
I have a really good friend.. I have been divorced 25 years.. my good friend used to be my MIL until the divorce...  
Sew With Love
Libby |
User: LeapFrog Libby
Member since: 05-01-2002 Total posts: 2022 
|
From: Sewhappie
Date: 07-10-2004, 06:50 PM (7 of 11)
|
You should change it to SISTER-in laws!!!!! Mine is a real pain in the backside and she lives just up the street!!!!!!!! Her own brother ( DH) doesn't even like having her around!!! Always trying to cause trouble in the family!!!! Now my brothers wife I have know all my life and consider her my sister. Our mothers were very close girlhood friends and where happy as bugs in a rug when my brother and S-I-L started dating and then married!!!!! I was even given S-I-L 's kid sisters name for my middle name!!!! |
User: Sewhappie
Member since: 10-27-2001 Total posts: 1427 |
From: DorothyL
Date: 07-11-2004, 09:40 AM (8 of 11)
|
I, too, have a sister-in-law from HELL. Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: MaryW
Date: 07-11-2004, 10:51 AM (9 of 11)
|
Me too, but she has passed on now so I won't speak ill of her. I really used to pity her kids spouses.
MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New |
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005 Total posts: 2542
|
From: Skye
Date: 07-11-2004, 10:23 PM (10 of 11)
|
Try this site for MIL stories http://216.193.207.28/cgi-bin/dcforum/dcboard.cgi |
User: Skye
Member since: 09-28-2000 Total posts: 233 |
From: MariLynnTX
Date: 07-19-2004, 01:46 PM (11 of 11)
|
I agree with Mary...I am a MIL, but I don't call my seven children--well, six living children; they call me every week and sometimes they ASK for my advice, which I am very sparing with! They always offer to do things for me and my DILs, except for one who is an ex-DIL and hates all of us, are wonderful girls and I am as fond of them as of my DDs. I am a widow and my sons and SILs are all very helpful, too, but I have a very full life of my own, so I don't interfere in theirs...live and let live, is my motto! I don't know exactly why my ex-DIL hates us, we used to like her, but she's the one who left my son with their four children so that she could enjoy her 'alternative lifestyle.' MariLynntx
Life is a song...we give it harmony or dissonance.
|
User: MariLynnTX
Member since: 08-13-2001 Total posts: 256 |
Visit Sew What’s Up for the latest sewing and quilting tips and discussions.
This page was originally located on Sew What’s New (www.sew-whats-new.com) at http://www.sew-whats-new.com/vb/archive/index.php/t-13202.html
Sew What’s Up is hosted by ZenSoft