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The Sew What’s New Archive
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From: DorothyL
Date: 05-26-2006, 09:29 PM (1 of 29)
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My daughter came to our little village to get her marriage certificate. She was here a couple weeks ago to talk to the town clerk about what kind of identification she would need since she lost her birth certificate and didn't want to bother with getting another -- it's a hassle since it is out of state and she was sort of, but not really, adopted. The clerk told her that she would take my word that she is who she says she is (I've known the clerk more than 15 years). The clerk wasn't there today but the assistant clerk didn't worry about ID. Not for my daughter or for Steve, her sweetie. "Just don't lie," she told them. "This goes to Albany (state capital)." So they filled out the form and can now marry in the state of New York -- well tomorrow they can get married in the state of New York. Amy decided to get a fishing license while she was there. Don't ask me why, but she did. For that she had to show her drivers license for ID. So I guess they don't care who you are or who you marry but they darn sure want to know who is fishing in the lake!! Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: AndreaSews
Date: 05-26-2006, 10:57 PM (2 of 29)
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I enjoyed that, Dorothy!
Andrea
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User: AndreaSews
Member since: 02-18-2005 Total posts: 1007 
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From: plrlegal
Date: 05-27-2006, 02:06 AM (3 of 29)
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Sounds about right for the legal system in this country Dorothy! I think the best one I've heard in a long time is illegal immigrants being made eligible for social security benefits by the fact that even though they stole and used someone else's social security number now they're entitled to social security benefits??? I akways thought identity theft was a crime and you could be sent to prison for it, but apparently not these days. Patsy Patsy
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User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
From: Sancin
Date: 05-27-2006, 02:22 AM (4 of 29)
I often wonder about the mentality and attitudes of petty beaurocrates - it is the same thing here with fishing licences. I reverted to my maiden name after I divorced. I had no trouble with the federal government, taxation dept or any credit agencies, but years later when I purchased a house they wanted me to show my divorce papers, which I didn't have. The land office would not accept the fact that I had been recognized everywhere else as an independent woman for over 5 years and that my former husband contributed no money and had nothing to do with my purchase! Go figure. I recently applied for a passport (we Canadians are going to need them to visit you, our neighbours soon) and the application was returned because of a minor problem, which in fact was not a problem when I submitted the form directly to the minister of external affairs. When the form was returned to me on the first application it was marked in red like a student's paper.  Many years ago when my children were very young I worked part time from home. A friend dared me to try and get my credit rating independant of my husband credit rating. The women's movement was blooming at the time. I took out a small loan for a household item to establish my credit rating (I had enough money in my own name in an account at that bank). After a number of words with our bank manager said my husband my had to come in to co sign for the loan. When I pointed out that I never cosigned for my husbands stock market loans he said it was different because if the bank took me to court for non payment and I cried they would lose their money. I was in a state of shock and didn't know whether to laugh or cry - I laughed my way out of the bank! I got my credit rating - in spite of the fact that when I told the manager times were changing and he stated he thought too fast. It was quite an experience for me moving from large cities to the north. Unfortunately, while attitudes have changed, the little woman still runs into some potholes. 
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
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User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005 Total posts: 895 
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From: MaryW
Date: 05-27-2006, 10:28 AM (5 of 29)
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My SIL couldn't get a loan in her name at their bank. Hubby could but she made more money than he did. He borrowed with no problem and no co-signer. She was told to go home and bring her husband back before they met with the loans officer. She was soooooooooooooo mad!
MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New |
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005 Total posts: 2542 
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From: LeapFrog Libby
Date: 05-27-2006, 08:53 PM (6 of 29)
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Dorothy, Tell your daughter about this.. When my sister was a young newlywed, her husband went fishing a lot.. He told her that she needed a fishing license so they could go fishing together.. He brought a pamphlet home from the game warden's office and told her to study hard because the test was not easy ! ! ! He quizzed her after she had studied, and then the next weekend , off they went.. When they got to the bait place, d---- told her to go in and tell the clerk she wanted to take the test to get a fishing license.. He was staying outside to pick out the bait, he said... My sister was so nervous she could only stammer out "fishing license" to the clerk.. Imagine her surprise when he opened a drawer , took out the license , took her money and told her to be sure and put her name and home address on the license.. She was furious about all those hours she had spent learning all the regulations about sizes and numbers of fish that were legal and what you had to throw back and all that other stuff.. She thought several times that day about throwing her husband out of the boat... We still tease her about going to try for a fishing license..
Sew With Love
Libby |
User: LeapFrog Libby
Member since: 05-01-2002 Total posts: 2022 
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From: Sherri
Date: 05-28-2006, 03:52 AM (7 of 29)
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My dh couldn't get a loan without me when we were first married
My website
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User: Sherri
Member since: 02-07-2001 Total posts: 357 |
From: DorothyL
Date: 05-28-2006, 08:40 AM (8 of 29)
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Libby, I love that story. Especially since my daughter wouldn't be getting a fishing license if it weren't for her man. They will be here today and I'll tell her. Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: Laurie H
Date: 05-28-2006, 11:21 AM (9 of 29)
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Dorothy, it's amazing what types of licenses seem to be important, doesn't it? A few years ago when DSis was trying to renew her driver's license she ran into a problem. It was the first time the DMV had computerized their records and she was getting a picture license. DSis had had her license for over 20 years, had been married with a name change for many of those years and never had a problem renewing before. This time, they wouldn't let her renew because they said her name on her license (her married name) didn't match her SS card. I guess she never thought to change that, but she had worked off and on and been paid and no one had every caught the error. She had to wait until she received a new SS card with her married name before she could renew her license and wound up driving for a month with an expired license. I can see why there is such a problem with identity theft. DSis was actually living under 2 different names and never knew it and no one caught her for a good many years. |
User: Laurie H
Member since: 05-07-2006 Total posts: 40 |
From: DorothyL
Date: 05-28-2006, 11:37 AM (10 of 29)
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Laurie I had the same thing happen with my Social Security card. I never bothered to change my name with Social Security. I got a new job at a place I had worked before and the personnel lady -- who knew me well from before -- said I couldn't get paid until I straightened it out. Some in the mid-to-late 90s I think Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: Sancin
Date: 05-28-2006, 07:42 PM (11 of 29)
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All these incidents seem to support the concept of never changing your name, even when married.
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
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User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005 Total posts: 895
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From: plrlegal
Date: 05-28-2006, 10:11 PM (12 of 29)
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That's why when dh and I divorced in 1974 I kept my married name and when we remarried 20 years later, I didn't have to go through all the crap again. Patsy Patsy
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User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
From: Sewhappie
Date: 05-29-2006, 09:03 PM (13 of 29)
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Pasty, Seems like it's only a crime for the person who's identity was stolen because they are left to deal with the mess that was created for them by someone else. The judicial system in this country doesn't care that your identity WAS stolen, but they want YOU to be responsible for cleaning it up. There's not such thing as innocent until proven guilty, you're just guilty. |
User: Sewhappie
Member since: 10-27-2001 Total posts: 1427 |
From: plrlegal
Date: 05-29-2006, 09:22 PM (14 of 29)
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What really fries my bunns is that the credit card companies absolutely will not take any responsibility at all for issuing credit cards to people who have stolen someone's identity. No way, they go after the poor, unsuspecting person whose identity has been stolen and make their lives hell over credit cards they had no idea even existed. And, the worst thing is they refuse to put a hold on those cards that have been issued fraudulently until the person whose identity was stolen can prove they never requested the cards and never had an idea they had been issued to someone using their identity.m We've had people come through the Attorney General's Consumer Protection Division that are having to file bankruptcy strictly because of credit card companies' refusal to cancel credit cared accounts issued to a person who stole their identity. Patsy Patsy
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User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
From: DorothyL
Date: 05-30-2006, 07:04 AM (15 of 29)
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I agree Patsy. The banks and credit card companies have gotten completely out of control. I get blasted with offers to loan me money. I get an average of two a day, I think. They all have fine print I need a magnifier to read. And anyone could reach in my mail box and have a card in my name. There are checks right in the envelope sometimes that anyone could cash. I worry less about the internet than my own mail box. Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: Laurie H
Date: 05-30-2006, 12:12 PM (16 of 29)
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When DD was in college, she kept getting all the same junk mail offering her the credit cards all the time. I just shredded all the offers like I do the ones we get. Every now and then, one of the offers will have a fake card with a phone number to call on it. I cut them up before tossing them. Well, one of those wasn't a fake card. It was a real Discover Card and I didn't know it. It was made out in DD's name and I simply cut it up and tossed it. After she graduated, she received a statement from Discover telling her that she had been such a great customer that they were raising her credit limit! She was furious and so was I. That's when I realized that card had been real. She never signed up for a card, but they sent her one anyway. Made me wonder just how many college students are sent cards without having applied for one. DD did try calling Discover many times trying to get them to cancel the card she never requested and after 2 years, I don't know if she ever did get it cancelled. I only know they gave her a hard time about it and at one point she received a new card because the old one expired! BTW, DD did not change her name when she got married. Some people think she was wrong (including her MIL), but she loves her name and it was less hassle. Her DH doesn't care what her name is. |
User: Laurie H
Member since: 05-07-2006 Total posts: 40 |
From: bluebirdie
Date: 05-30-2006, 03:43 PM (17 of 29)
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I haven't changed my last name after married for decades (have been busy). My husband doesn't care if I don't. Decades ago he said we together had too many accounts and too much paper works so he simply closed his bank accounts and rolled his balance over to mine. I then called my bank and credit card companies to add his name to my accounts. My husband is a big man. Something interesting happened this month. This lady from my bank kept on calling when my husband was out of town on business. She refused to talk to me, the wife. After many calls, I asked her the purpose. Turned out she's selling insurance and she could not talk to the wife, only the husband. I politely asked her to never call my home again. Nothing personal... I just don't feel like talking to a woman discreminating other women. - Robin
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User: bluebirdie
Member since: 03-12-2006 Total posts: 139 |
From: Sewhappie
Date: 05-30-2006, 08:49 PM (18 of 29)
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They have a "opt-out" thru the credit bureaus to stop getting credit card offers, I found it on our local Fox station after they did a story on it. I signed up all three of us, we all signed the opt-out form and mailed it in. This was 6 months ago and MAYBE 3 have been sent to us in the past 6 months. This is down from 6-7 a week. Creidt Card companies will target College students who have applied for loans for school and be UNBEARABLE to deal with. We keep getting phone offers and ask for my "daughter" Morgan ( meaning they say "she or her" a lot during their pitch.) I just tell them they have the wrong number. DS is a boy with a unisex name, they don't need to know that. I also agree with you Pasty, Banks and Credit Card companies need to be responsible for their actions and their part in the unending problem of Idenity Theft. We have had to deal with it in my family and it's not a simple matter to deal with. |
User: Sewhappie
Member since: 10-27-2001 Total posts: 1427 |
From: Laurie H
Date: 05-31-2006, 09:15 AM (19 of 29)
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I signed us all up for the opt-out option as well, but there are still a couple of companies that don't use that, at least that's what the fine print says. There is also the problem that because I do have one credit card I like to use occasionally, I continue to get offers from that company. I don't want more credit cards from that company, one card is enough, but since I use it, that's enough for them. If someone checks their credit rating/report, that will void that opt-out option, because it's all through the same 3 companies. They're all tied in together. It's almost impossible to get away from it these days and the only ones who are ever held responsible is us. It's just not fair. Like some of you mentioned, something has to be done. Why should we be responsible for a bank giving a mortgage to someone with phony credentials? They should eat the loss, not us. Same with the credit card companies. If they didn't send out all that crap, there wouldn't be the problem there is. |
User: Laurie H
Member since: 05-07-2006 Total posts: 40 |
From: bluebirdie
Date: 05-31-2006, 03:52 PM (20 of 29)
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Hm... I never heard of opt-out. Just went checking them out, and read that I need to fill out forms with SSI and send them to those credit card companies (the ones that spammed me do not have online opt-out). That doesn't sound right. I must be missing something...
- Robin
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User: bluebirdie
Member since: 03-12-2006 Total posts: 139 |
From: Sancin
Date: 05-31-2006, 07:15 PM (21 of 29)
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I save them all in a pile, taking off my name on anything and every once and awhile mail all my junk mail to someone who had sent it in a addressed stamped envelop. Doesn't do much but makes me feel I have some control!
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
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User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005 Total posts: 895
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From: plrlegal
Date: 05-31-2006, 11:10 PM (22 of 29)
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Hey Sancin, that's a great idea. I think I'll try that one time to see how it feels. Patsy Patsy
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User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
From: Sherri
Date: 05-31-2006, 11:23 PM (23 of 29)
I do that to look this week mastercard gets a grocery store flier  
My website
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User: Sherri
Member since: 02-07-2001 Total posts: 357 |
From: Laurie H
Date: 06-01-2006, 10:25 AM (24 of 29)
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I didn't have to include my SS# when I did the opt out. If they had asked for it, I wouldn't have done it. I like the idea of mailing things back to places where they mail from in the first place. Never thought of that. I shred everything that has our name on it and and that which needs to be completed or signed. I also shred all the labels from my prescription bottles and things like that. I don't want anything in my trash that tells anything about us these days. |
User: Laurie H
Member since: 05-07-2006 Total posts: 40 |
From: bluebirdie
Date: 06-01-2006, 11:55 AM (25 of 29)
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Hm... Maybe optout had changed since it started. Anways I called optout again today and indeed were asked for SSI. I checked their authenticity and involuntarily supplied that. There's got to be a way to eliminate the 10lbs of junk mails every week. How many trees we must kill before we give in to a credit card company or a bank? Sigh! - Robin
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User: bluebirdie
Member since: 03-12-2006 Total posts: 139 |
From: bridesmom
Date: 06-07-2006, 12:54 AM (26 of 29)
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Nancy, at the beginning of this thread you mentioned about getting your passport, did it take a long time to get through all the red tape? We have been trying to decide if we should get ours now or wait til spring but either way I am not relishing a 2-4 hour wait in Surrey at the passport office. Laura
Laura
Tickled pink with my Innovis 4000D |
User: bridesmom
Member since: 01-21-2004 Total posts: 2026 |
From: pretnichols
Date: 06-07-2006, 08:13 AM (27 of 29)
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Okay ladies, here is a way to get rid of the unwanted mail you receive daily. Some do require your SSN# -- but I have to be honest, I get 1/100th the mail I used to receive. I am about to put DH's through this process, as he averages 3-5 credit card offers a day. (I didn't know that there were that many companies out there!!) However, I use my married name for all things, except when I need to register online for something. I use my maiden name so I can see who "sells" my name. They immediately lose my business due to the fact that they promised not to sell it. http://www.creditsourceonline.com/opt-out.html As for getting credit.....I have a much higher score than my DH's. He always pays his CC's late and piles up late fees. I paid 100% of the bills, except those. Twice we got a higher interest rate, because of his histroy. So, I took over everything about 10 months ago! His score is steadily increasing, but he has to give me his payments and I make sure they arrive on time. He was never taught money management; budgeting, savings, or finance. I haven't worked out of the house in about 3 years, and even now only work about 10 hours a week. Two years ago when we were getting a new home equity line of credit, 2 companies would not put my name on the account since I did not provide a source of income. I was really ticked off, and they did not get our business. However, they were going to use MY credit score to allow us to secure the loan!!  Needless to say, we told them to take a hike (and boy did they come begging afterward). However, now our mortgage company is playing the same game as Bluebirdie. She told me he needed to make all our financial decision as he is the main income provider. I told her she could talk to him anytime she wanted, but he was only going to say "huh" and hand the phone to me! Okay, time to get off my "platform"......! Have a great day! Peggy
So little time, sew much to do........... |
User: pretnichols
Member since: 10-16-2005 Total posts: 342 |
From: Shellymoon
Date: 06-11-2006, 12:15 AM (28 of 29)
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Dorothy... I think your daughter's marriage is off to a good start if she got a fishing license along with her marriage license. That sounds like something out of one of those "You might be a redneck if..." comedians! Does she plan to use the fishing license on her honeymoon? As for worthless licenses...I got a note in my water bill last month reminding me that I have to get a special plumbing building permit if I want to replace my hot water heater! So far I've paid the city to register my animals ($15 yearly, and ignore my home invasion alarm when it goes off ($25 per year) and now if I want to install a water heater, I'll have to fork over another $20. I wonder if they know we built a new closet and replastered the ceilings last year....there's probably a special permit for "expanding storage space" and "repairing cracks." This is from the city that proudly says "Hey, we haven't raised your taxes in 10 years!" Shelly Moon
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User: Shellymoon
Member since: 05-27-2001 Total posts: 240 |
From: stephi
Date: 06-12-2006, 12:35 PM (29 of 29)
Me and Hubs never once showed ID to the court when we went to get married. We just filled out a form had it notorized by a friend and wrote a check.... I found it somewhat odd that they never once asked for any form of ID or proof that niether had been married before or anything of that sort. Maybe because they can look it all up online now?! 
Stephi
"No body knows what it is that I do until I dont do it" "if you do what you have always done you will get what you have always gotten" |
User: stephi
Member since: 03-17-2006 Total posts: 361 
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