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From: Patty22
Date: 10-15-2006, 04:12 PM (1 of 27)
I went to the grocery store this afternoon with my husband. As I was walking through the doors, an elderly woman starts to poke me with her cane and yell, "hellllooooo. Get me a cart."

I dodged the cane luckily and got her a cart. She started yammering (yes, she was yammering) about how I was going to be old one day too.

Since when did being "old" excuse someone from using manners. I have always tried to treat everyone with dignity and be aware of anyone with needs.

My husband was with me and he was there whispering, calm down and there isn't any use talking reason to someone that miserable.

So, even though the woman "pissed" me off, I never enjoyed the company of my husband so much. I think he kept me away from her in the store :bg:
Patty
User: Patty22
Member since: 03-29-2006
Total posts: 1194
From: DorothyL
Date: 10-15-2006, 05:23 PM (2 of 27)
What Patty failed to mention -- that old lady was me!!!

Not really. I was at the glasses store being incredibly patient (that's rare) while we waited an hour after my appointment to get a test because the computer was down. And it only got slower after that.
And, boy, glasses expensive now days!
Dorothy
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: Patty22
Date: 10-15-2006, 05:51 PM (3 of 27)
Dorothy, you have too much sunshine to be as miserable as that old geezer.

Furthemore, if it was you, I would have knocked you down giving you a hug.

Glasses and lenses are expensive! Bwhahahahaha...should have gotten out your pad of paper, stuck on your press ID tag, put your pencil behind your ear and let them think you're doing a not so undercover story on the establishment. Bwhahahahaha.... wonder if they would have stepped up their pace?
Patty
User: Patty22
Member since: 03-29-2006
Total posts: 1194
From: lendube
Date: 10-15-2006, 05:53 PM (4 of 27)
I agree with you Patty! (And you too, Dorothy, glasses are very expensive!)

I don't know what it is about very old people. They often just don't care what people think and they feel very entitled to being treated with respect when they don't necessarily dish it out.

My mother lives in a retirement community and the stories she tells me! She says that the older people get the "smaller" their world gets. It's all about me, me, me. Now this is my Mom who's dealing (albeit very long distance) with her Mother who's still kicking at 97!

Luckily my Mom isn't to the old, old stage (at 76) but I see little signs of it as in when she calls or I call her and it's all about her from the word go. Sometimes I just say, "Well, we're all doing fine around here." Luckily she gets it and we just laugh.

The best we can do is hope we remember enough about being younger when we're older.

Lennie :bg:
User: lendube
Member since: 08-06-2006
Total posts: 1548
From: Magot
Date: 10-15-2006, 06:24 PM (5 of 27)
There is no excuse to be rude be you young or old. My MIL (73) shops for an old lady near her (78) and is frequently shoulder barged by old ladies younger than her who think they have a right to get on the bus first. The bus driver puts them straight!
It costs 20 here to get an eye test and I used that prescription to buy my glasses on line for 17:50

http://www.glassesdirect.co.uk/?vcn=google&gclid=CKTyx7-P_IcCFQcGQgodhy4cFw

what a bargain they were! Well made, hard case and 3 day turnaround. Anything like that in the states? (glasses will normally cost about 80-100)
love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us
Cells a Speciality
DNA to order.
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002
Total posts: 3626
From: DorothyL
Date: 10-15-2006, 07:01 PM (6 of 27)
Ah, but Jan, I don't see the bright red ones with rhinestones I got for reading!!
Then I went a little more conservative for walking around glasses.
I do think we went to an especially expensive place because it was in the mall. The place we went to before at least had a bargain rack. These were all designer brands and the cheapest I saw were $120 or there abouts for the frames.
Then there was the cost of the lenses.
My husband said the eye exam was no more than at WalMart where the frames are cheaper but we don't shop there.
Also this was ready in an hour place but with the computer down they will be ready "tomorrow at the latest."
I got two pair -- I'm sick of bifocals. I was just going to get one prescription and a pair of cheap reading glasses but the doctor said that's not going to work with my stigmatism. He strongly suggested bifocals because they are cheaper than two pair but I keep taking them off and not using the bottom part anyway.

I think older people who are cranky might be in pain. I have a lot of pain and sometimes it makes me cranky. Or sometimes I'm cranky just for fun.
Dorothy
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: MaryW
Date: 10-15-2006, 08:05 PM (7 of 27)
Sounds like Maxine to me. :wink:
MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005
Total posts: 2542
From: Chrysantha
Date: 10-15-2006, 10:04 PM (8 of 27)
I was accosted by an old woman (and I mean old, not in the age sense, I mean the idiot sense) in the grocery store one day...she hit me with a bag of potatoes as I was walking by, I said excuse me, she TOLD me, 'get that BOY over here...I said what boy...I didn't see anyone around...she said ' that BOY in there and she pointed'...I saw an African American man standing behind the fruit cutting counter...I said I don't see any BOY...she said...that BLACK BOY....I said...he's a man and I'll see if he will help you'. I was mortified..I asked the man if he knew her and he said yes, that she was a regular customer...I'm sorry...but I almost hit her and told her to shut up. NO ONE deserves that much disrespect...customer or not...jackass woman...(I know I live in the south...but it's 2006, not 1706)

I agree about the glasses being expensive. (my husband and I pay about $1600. a yr for JUST the glasses. -2- pair...one mine (I have to have special lenses) and one his. (he likes designer frames). I'll wear any frames that fit my small fat face...having worn glassses for 42 yrs now...I don't care how they look as long as I can see.)
My sister likes Lense Crafters. (of course she's only worn galsses for a few yrs now...she just turned 45.)

I've told eveyone around me...if I EVER turn into a cranky old lady...shoot me...
Chrys
User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002
Total posts: 2414
From: ninifav
Date: 10-15-2006, 10:51 PM (9 of 27)
Now, Kath, you know that you left yourself wide open with that one!!! ...I mean you have NEVER been cranky...(oh, wait, aren't you the one who told me to get the duct tape for the unruly family wedding guests...hehehehe...)
We'll shoot you with those nerf bullets..hehe
User: ninifav
Member since: 09-06-2004
Total posts: 204
From: Chrysantha
Date: 10-15-2006, 11:51 PM (10 of 27)
Thats not being cranky...thats self defense !!!:shock:
Self preservation....(etc...):bg: :bg: :bg:
Chrys
User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002
Total posts: 2414
From: Sancin
Date: 10-16-2006, 01:30 AM (11 of 27)
I'm not going to be popular with this one. I agree that people should be more polite at all ages. But as Dorothy said she may have been in pain. I have had the sensation (particularly in big box stores that are busy and crowded and I am in agony) that I wanted to ram my basket through everyone just to get out sooner. :shock: The old lady mentions may also be confused and suffering or beginning to suffer from dementia and doesn't want anyone to know she may be fragile and need help - thus is bullying about it. When my mother went to live in a long term care facility for demented (Alzeheimers +) the staff always said what a lady she was. And she was, in relation to most of the other residents. On the other hand around family my mother really wasn't much of a lady. She didn't want us to know she was forgetting things. Her being a 'lady' with strangers was reverting to learned behaviour and was almost rote. SHE really wasn't there. People often lose ability as they age to do and remember everday things, like how to get a buggy out of a stack or the words "excuse me".

Further, I used to tell my students that people didn't have to be nice people to get ill or be in the health care system - or in this case, to be out in public. All sorts of people have bad things happen to them. Nor do the elderly become less bigoted when they get older - may in fact get more so. As one ages one loses a lot of sensation and may not realize they are pushing or shoving. And everyone when not feeling well tends to revert to earlier behaviour. Maybe the older person was always rude and is now ruder.

On the other hand - they may feel they have the right, because of suffering through life to do and say as they please ......... and wear whatever they want! :wink: And, it can be fun, maybe! :re: Sometimes Maxine is the more truthful person.
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005
Total posts: 895
From: MotherInLaw
Date: 10-16-2006, 02:44 AM (12 of 27)
That's funny this post is of this subject. I had to run errands with my son Friday and I had to get my computer ..........it turned out to be a long day for all of us. My son was telling me things like "chill out Mama, don't get so bent out of shape," I was on his case about how he was driving............my truck. LOL He said you are getting just like MawMaw, (my mother bless her heart)(she's gone as you all know). anyway I told him that was a compliment and that one day he's going to be in my shoes with his kids and I'm going to remind him then what he was telling me now. Funny thing is I see my Mom in myself and I would see her Mom in her when she did those same things. It all rolls down hill. I'm pretty out spoken with my sons and their spouses. I say it's to help them, they say it's me being old and ornery. They'll find out one of these days who's right. I hope I'm around to see all the fun they are going to have. :up:
I'm regressing back into my youth, I just have to figure out how I'm going to convience my body to come along with me.
User: MotherInLaw
Member since: 06-25-2005
Total posts: 1118
From: DorothyL
Date: 10-16-2006, 08:24 AM (13 of 27)
I always said that when I get really old I will live across the street from an elementary school (preferably on the corner), have lots of cats and sweep the front steps with a big broom every morning when the kids are walking to school.
I also want a cane to poke people with.
Dorothy
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: Patty22
Date: 10-16-2006, 09:52 AM (14 of 27)
Oh yes, aging and not feeling well doesn't bring out the best in some people. My MIL has dementia and we have her frequently over for dinner in the evening. I am mortified at some of her "old world" thoughts that have resurfaced and insensitivity to anyone different from herself; especially when the kids are home because I don't want them to remember their grandmother in this light. My oldest son lives at home (is mentally/physically challenged) and he went into another room and started laughing at one of his grandmother's quips. Laughing is very good medicine!

However, I'm with Kath..........if I get like this, let me take a walk in the woods and never be found.

Now Dorothy, are you also planning on building your home on the corner lot out of gingerbread?
Patty
User: Patty22
Member since: 03-29-2006
Total posts: 1194
From: DorothyL
Date: 10-16-2006, 12:18 PM (15 of 27)
Why yes, Patty, I am.
Dorothy
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: Patty22
Date: 10-16-2006, 01:04 PM (16 of 27)
Nancy, you are a kind spirit. Thank God the health profession has someone such as yourself in the role as teacher/mentor.
Patty
User: Patty22
Member since: 03-29-2006
Total posts: 1194
From: mommydionne
Date: 10-16-2006, 09:38 PM (17 of 27)
well.... some older folks are nasty, they are likely the ones who were nasty when they were younger as well:bg:
but there has been some stuff that has shown your frontal lobes (on ye old brain) shrink up a bit as you age and that causes some disinhibition (kinda like a couple of beers can bring out ones dancing ability at the clubs:bluewink: )
that having been said I've had folks smash my kids with glass doors and then look at me like it was my fault?! go figure,
later in life I plan to get a new convertable (bmw, preferable an M) and ride it around and make all the young folks jealous... I don't think anyone is jealous of my minivan:dave:
Jeanette
User: mommydionne
Member since: 01-08-2004
Total posts: 838
From: Sancin
Date: 10-17-2006, 04:31 AM (18 of 27)
I am sorry to say, Jeanette - I have to agree, I don't think anyone is jealous of your mini van :wink:
Personally I always hoped when I got old I would have a chauffeur - instead I have an Echo.

My daughter got me the book with the poem "When I am an old lady I shall wear purple" when I was about 45. At the time she told me I must already be old because I wore purple and I already picked other peoples flowers (I call it pruning, so more flowers will grow!!) :up: So folks, don't leave your flowers out where I can pick them. However, I will be nice and kind to you and your children, it I can see you or them. :smile:
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005
Total posts: 895
From: MotherInLaw
Date: 10-17-2006, 02:41 PM (19 of 27)
Jeanette, My dream car is a 1969 (year I was married and graduated from High School) Camero convertible, red with white rally stripes. When we ride in my husbands 1930 coupe we get all kinds of whaoooos from the old and young.
I'm regressing back into my youth, I just have to figure out how I'm going to convience my body to come along with me.
User: MotherInLaw
Member since: 06-25-2005
Total posts: 1118
From: mommydionne
Date: 10-17-2006, 03:01 PM (20 of 27)
mmmm that sounds nice, My dad has his dream car, a '57 chevy Bel Air, and it PINK!! too funny, the only car I know of that looks good with fuzzy dice.
vans are boring sigh, but they are ok on gas and have enough seats!!:sick:
Jeanette
User: mommydionne
Member since: 01-08-2004
Total posts: 838
From: mamadus
Date: 10-17-2006, 10:36 PM (21 of 27)
when I'm old Im going to build my house on the corner opposite Dorothy... but I'm going to have a bunch of chihuahuas instead of cats and let them all be yappy ankle biters,.....:bg: we'll get out there with our brooms and our animals Dorothy, and perhaps a couple of big black hats!!:wink:

MO
life is too short, not to explore
User: mamadus
Member since: 12-31-2004
Total posts: 492
From: Shellymoon
Date: 10-22-2006, 12:01 AM (22 of 27)
Dorothy....there was an old woman like that who lived close to our elementary school! She had a huge vine-covered trellis that ran all along her front porch, so when you went to knock on her door it was all dark and spooky and your friends couldn't really see what you were doing because of all the foliage.

I was convinced this woman was a real live witch. Now I feel bad about how much we kids harrassed her. We're probably lucky she couldn't afford a gun LOL!!!!

FYI...I get my glasses and my girls contacts at SuperTarget. Love that place. Glasses are good quality and they've got an opthalmologist and an optometrist on site who does (don't faint) WEEKEND APPOINTMENTS! They also do adjusments on my glasses, gratis. Love the red bullseye more and more every day!
Shelly Moon
User: Shellymoon
Member since: 05-27-2001
Total posts: 240
From: Longblades
Date: 10-24-2006, 02:07 PM (23 of 27)
Sad to say that sounds a bit like my Mum. She's 88, still bright and "with it" and living in her own home and doing her own shopping and cooking. But when I've gone with her to the grocery store sometimes I notice how rude she is to other people. She stands and glares if they are in front of the bin she wants to get at, shoves their carts aside and I'm afraid might ram someone with her cart. She doesn't look 88 and I'm afraid someone will punch her lights out some day. Oh, and if she is in some one else's way she takes her sweet time with whatever she is looking at.

On the glasses topic, I am fairly short sighted (-9.25) and have a very small face and need bifocals. Some things I've learned - check the quality of the lenses of the cheapie place, it is often less than the more expensive and the stronger your Prescription the more difference that will make. In some areas your Optometrist or Opthamologist is required by law to sell at wholesale prices and the same item will cost a lot more at an Opticians. The Opticians usually have a bigger selection of frames though, but you could buy frames at the one and get the lens through the other. Or the Optometrist or Opthamologist can often order in the frames you like. Last year I paid $696 Canadian for new glasses. Most of the expense went to get 7.4 indexing in my plastic lenses, which considerably reduced the weight, along with smaller lenses. My contact lenses are much cheaper but I need glasses too, as back-up and relief.
User: Longblades
Member since: 07-14-2005
Total posts: 182
From: Sancin
Date: 10-24-2006, 04:56 PM (24 of 27)
Gosh Longblades, I have similar sight as you but I wear trifocals. On advice of my opthamologist I tried Costco, got some of the smaller frames, the glass coated for $249. I couldn't believe it. I did shop around and prices were lower last year than they had been 5 years ago when I got my last lens. I found Sears the most expensive and had the ugliest frames. You are right about the 'come on' prices in that often they are only for the most basic of prescriptions. I do not wear graduated lens as I had them for 3 months at one point and was nauseated the whole time. I don't even notice the lines in glasses as one blinks as one passes them.
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005
Total posts: 895
From: Longblades
Date: 10-24-2006, 07:39 PM (25 of 27)
Did you try to go from trifocals to linefree? Apparently that is very difficult for most folk, if they've gotten used to the trifocals. After her cataract surgeries my Mum didn't really need her trif. anymore but we were cautioned not to go line free as she had worn the tri.s for decades. So what does she do? She buys bifocals. I think that was another example of her misunderstanding due to her poor hearing. Anyway, she is doing fine with them, does miss the middle range a bit but is not really doing activities like gardening or painting or computer work where she would need that middle range much.

Have you tried contacts Sancin? I have mono vision in my contacts. I see distance with one eye and closer with the other. It works really well for me and I can switch between the (linefree so I do really get a bit of midrange in the graduation) bifocal glasses and the contacts with only a rest of around five minutes in between, to adjust. I can see much better with the contacts, have periferal vision and no fogging up in the cold, easier to shave your legs in the bath. :) I bet a lot of people don't realize we need to wear our glasses to see our legs. Or at least the nubblies thereon.
User: Longblades
Member since: 07-14-2005
Total posts: 182
From: Sancin
Date: 10-24-2006, 10:36 PM (26 of 27)
Initially I went from reading glasses to graduated bifocal lens, then after the nausea I went to lined bifocals and then to lined trifocals. I was not charged for the lens change when they made me ill, which surprised me. I have had people say to me they don't even realize I have trifocals, let alone bifocals, I think because I have glarefree lens. I also am quite fussy about where the lines are and when being fitted I do everything I do in a day for the opticians.
As I was teaching/lecturing as well as supervising and doing psychomotor activities as well as the fact that tend to be an animated person, moving my head a great deal, I think that was the problem. The space for lens difference with graduated lens is not great.
I would never consider contacts. I have had migraines most of my life and the very thought of putting anything in my eyes triggers a migraine itself!!
My next change will be after cartaract removal in a couple of years and I have no idea what will be recommended. At this stage of my life I cannot think without my glasses which makes for some funny scenerios if the telephone rings when I am in bed or have houseguests. :dave:
*~*~*~* Nancy*~*~*~* " I try to take one day at a time - but sometimes several days attack me at once."
User: Sancin
Member since: 02-13-2005
Total posts: 895
From: Longblades
Date: 10-25-2006, 01:23 PM (27 of 27)
It's too bad you can't tolerate the contacts. With my Px my Optometrist says they give me better vision than the glasses. I have migraines too but I am not squeamish about putting the lenses in. I've worn glasses since age four and started the contacts at age 23, before I knew I had migraines.

I know what you mean about not being able to think if you can't see. I used to try to navigate my house in the morning without mine (till the day I put coffee in an upside down cup) and said to my husband many times, "don't ask me anything serious in the morning; if I'm not wearing my glasses I can't hear you and I can't think straight." I have excellent hearing but not without my vision.
User: Longblades
Member since: 07-14-2005
Total posts: 182
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