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This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and quilting message board “Sew What’s New,” which was retired in August 2007. It is being provided by “Sew What’s Up,” which serves as the new home for many members of “Sew What’s New.”
From: ckmom002
Date: 11-09-2006, 11:33 PM (1 of 19)
well its now 10:30 my kids bed time is 8:30 so now 2 hours later i am still fighting with my 4 yr old to go to sleep........ i dont know what to do (any suggestions) i know he takes a nap at school for an hour and half but there is nothing i can do about that.. i jsut dont understand how 2 hours he can still be in bed wide awake
calling "mommy" "mommy" every 2 minutes its always something diffrnet "can i have a drink of water" "can i have some peanut butter crackers" well i dont give into him he just make him go back to bed.... well needless to say i cant go to bed until he does.. i am getting so frustrated this is a everynight deal... i have him in the bedroom right now listening to enigma LOL im about to make him a lullubby cd..

but please if anyone has any suggestions please help me
thank you for letting me vent i needed it!!!
User: ckmom002
Member since: 06-11-2006
Total posts: 105
From: DorothyL
Date: 11-10-2006, 12:07 AM (2 of 19)
Have you tried reading to him?
With the dog we take her out and run her.
How about making him scrub floors till he can't stay awake?
A couple shots of whiskey?
Okay -- I'm joking and I know it is a serious problem for you.
My oldest daughter was like that. She just plain didn't need that nap at school.
I was lucky enough that she wiggled and giggled and jabbered at school nap time so they just let her have quiet time and read to her -- and a couple other kids -- and once she started skipping the nap she was alright.
I'd talk to the teacher and if they can't adjust to your son's needs think about changing schools.
He just can't be the only 4-year-old that doesn't need that nap. Maybe you should talk to some of the other mothers.
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: MotherInLaw
Date: 11-10-2006, 12:08 AM (3 of 19)
Did this just start recently or has this been going on? I would check to see if there is anything in his diet that is stimulating him right before you put him down. I know I'm no kid but if I eat something too late and try to go to bed I have a hard time falling to sleep. Just a thought. It's been 24 years since I've had a little one that age to contend with so my brain is not as fresh as someone younger. My son had that problem with his baby tonight. She fell asleep early and woke up and now she's ready to go and he's wanting to go to bed.
I'm regressing back into my youth, I just have to figure out how I'm going to convience my body to come along with me.
User: MotherInLaw
Member since: 06-25-2005
Total posts: 1118
From: ckmom002
Date: 11-10-2006, 12:22 AM (4 of 19)
Yes He Could Really Do Without The Nap At School They Said He Is The First To Fall Asleep And The Hardest To Wake Up Lol, Well The Enigma Cd Worked Im Going To Go Tomarrow And Buy A Sleepy Cd And See If That Works. Thanks Guys For Understanding It Really Helps When You Have Someone To Talk To And Understand Your Probloms... Well Im Going To Bed Now Lol!!!

User: ckmom002
Member since: 06-11-2006
Total posts: 105
From: lizzybugsmommy
Date: 11-10-2006, 01:09 AM (5 of 19)
I know your pain, but mine doesnt take a nap and it is still this way. It is midnight and she is still awake staring at the wall. I have heard of a natural thing called meletonin to try. I am considering calling her dr to see if this will be ok for her. My nephew started taking it and it has worked wonders for him. Has anyone else ever heard of this. I know it is perscribed for adhd kids who cant sleep. It is over the counter in health section of the store.I know my dr will say routine, routine, I do have one for her bed at 8:30 every night and it sometimes is 3 or 4 before she falls asleep.then up between 6and 7 every morning. I am lucky I dont have to work or I would have been fired for falling asleep on the job. We could just take turns everyother night with them LOL. I know I could use the sleep.
Catherine lb_pml&cb=PW

Husbands gone fishing..... I've gone fabric shopping
User: lizzybugsmommy
Member since: 05-20-2006
Total posts: 207
From: ckmom002
Date: 11-10-2006, 08:12 AM (6 of 19)
i have heard of that stuff to i might ask codys doctor about it to!!! Someone also told me about those relaxation cds so im going to try that also!!! He is also up first thing in the morning bc he has school so maybe thats y he takes a nap so easily im going to talk to his teacher today!!

well i hope yall have a good day i have to go volenteer at the school...
User: ckmom002
Member since: 06-11-2006
Total posts: 105
From: MaryW
Date: 11-10-2006, 08:19 AM (7 of 19)
Melatonin is a natural safe way to help kids sleep. My daughters buy it at the health food store for my grandsons. They have a hard time going to bed too. I have had it recommended for my oldest grandson when meds keep him stimulated. :sad:
owner/editor of Sew Whats New
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005
Total posts: 2542
From: DorothyL
Date: 11-10-2006, 08:53 AM (8 of 19)
After I went to bed last night I got to thinking, like Susie, about diet.
Have you considered cutting artificial flavors and, especially colors, out of the diet or at least reduced them.
Drinks are especially bad for this.
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: lendube
Date: 11-10-2006, 12:31 PM (9 of 19)
HI, I have to agree that the daytime nap is the problem here. I've tried melatonin for myself and noticed no difference what so ever but with kids it is different.

My daughter has always been a night owl. Never one to take naps either. I just let her stay awake "reading" or playing quietly in her room and she'd fall asleep sooner or later. She still doesn't need a lot of sleep.

Good luck. Lennie
User: lendube
Member since: 08-06-2006
Total posts: 1548
From: Patty22
Date: 11-10-2006, 12:50 PM (10 of 19)
My husband and I had a terrible time getting my second son to go to bed at night. We would read to him and then we would crawl on the floor to get out the door so he wouldn't see us.............he would eventually make his way to the family room. I even tried putting gates across the stairs, etc. and decided when he crawled over two gates that we needed to change tactics. I was more afraid that he was going to hurt himself.

We allowed him to snuggle up on the couch at night rather than insisting he go to bed and he just closed his eyes and was out. Now I know this isn't what is suggested, but once it didn't become an issue, he would just go to sleep. I think he just wanted to know that we were close.

I'm thinking that the nap time is the problem as my little one would never nap and when he decided he wanted to sleep, no matter where he was, he would just curl up and get a few z's.

Hope you find some solutions......
User: Patty22
Member since: 03-29-2006
Total posts: 1194
From: LeapFrog Libby
Date: 11-10-2006, 06:41 PM (11 of 19)
44 years ago when we had this problem, My Dear Pediatrician said put a radio in the room with him and turn it on a station w/ music.. Worked like a charm, and best of all , it taught him to sleep through noise ..That is a tradition in all branches of the family now, and we don't have to worry about babies sleeping.. Noises do not wake them up.. Normal noises , that is..
Sew With Love
User: LeapFrog Libby
Member since: 05-01-2002
Total posts: 2022
From: acadienne
Date: 11-11-2006, 11:18 AM (12 of 19)
You have received some wonderful suggestions as well as ideas as to what maybe the cause of your son not wanting to sleep.

My youngest, even while I was pregnant, would wake me up in the middle of the night just a squirming. Once she was born, it was the same. As a newborn, this girl would sleep a wonderful schedule from 6am to 4pm, then was awake till about 1am with nursing every other hour. It took a tole on me at the time and thank God I wasn`t working at the time.

Now, she is 14 and has always had trouble sleeping. Her father is a light sleeper and can go with a minimal of 2hrs sleep daily. Her bedtime is 11pm and never goes to sleep till after midnight and is up by 6:30am to get ready for the school as she takes the bus at 7:35am and doesn`t get home till 4:15pm. She now has a working schedule as I call it.

We tried everything from a very young age....removed any artificial coloring, especially red as it is the worse. Tried to give her treats that were homemade and would read the labels of ingredients on everything I bought. There are things out there that are great for them without the artificial coloring added. Also any processed meat has to be removed. Mine would live off of hotdogs and that proved to be a killer for her as she would be restless and high energy. The best thing is to observe and chart any unusual behavior he has and what he has eaten before. YOu might see a pattern evolve as we certainly did with our youngest.

At the age of 8, she was diagnosed as ADHD and ODD. The psychiatrist wanted her on meds and into councelling, but where she was mild, we decided to work with her and do the councelling part. Her councellor, who is also a MD, confirmed the diagnosis. He said to permit her to let her energy go by registering her into sports or anything high energy so that it will tire her out. She loves soccer so she played soccer in the summer and during school months, she was in dance.

Some kids just need to unwind and sounds like your son might be one of those, just like my youngest, but could have other health issues that you are unaware of as well. She was always the first one up and last one going to bed, even after her oldest 3.5 yr old sister.

Another thing is to be consistant with them. If you say or do one thing and your spouse says or does another, then you are working against one another and he will sense this and use it to his advantage.

Have you tried a reward method of getting him to settle down at bedtime? Say the first time he stays in bed and goes to sleep, the next day you mention just how nice it was of him to do this and give him a reward. Does not have to be anything big....say a meal of his choosing on the weekend when he is not in school, a treat of somekind like ice cream with his special sauce. I had things bought at the dollar store and would do these suggestions as well has offer one reward. At first she would take the gift but where she missed her favorite meals like hotdogs, she would choose it and would be given on the weekend.

AS for the meletonin, my oldest just recently started taking them and they work for her. She was sleep deprived due to her migraines. Now she is almost migraine free and sleeps better nights with the meletonin. What I like is that it is natural and it is what the body lacks the most of which causes them not to sleep. It is the samy psychiatrist that suggested this for my oldest as he who diagnosed my youngest.

Hope these suggestions work along with the others.

A bientot mes amies
"Don't take your organs to Heaven........Heaven knows we need them here"
please check out my online photos of my family, crafting, etc.

ASC hug pillow for the IWK[/SIGPIC]
User: acadienne
Member since: 10-02-2006
Total posts: 13
From: Ms Sheila
Date: 11-11-2006, 06:33 PM (13 of 19)
There have been some great suggestions here. Since all children are different you will probably have to use trial and error to find the right solution for your son.

My suggestion is to set up a routine that includes quiet reading, snuggle time and then off to bed with soothing music. I like native american drum and flute music for helping children sleep. I think the reason that your son is the first to fall asleep and is difficult to wake up at daycare is because of the lack of sleep at night. Give him some activities a few hours before bedtime that will tire him, lots of physical activity.

What ever you try will require consistancy. You will have to do it for several weeks before knowing if it is working because your son will have to adjust it it.

I wish you luck. Just know that this will not last forever even though it seems so right now.

User: Ms Sheila
Member since: 11-11-2006
Total posts: 13
From: ckmom002
Date: 11-11-2006, 08:10 PM (14 of 19)
I never thought about the native american music , but now thinking about it it is very soothing ill have to see if i can download some of that !!!
User: ckmom002
Member since: 06-11-2006
Total posts: 105
From: cowqueenie
Date: 11-21-2006, 10:25 AM (15 of 19)
I agree with Ms. Sheila. Routine is one of the best things that are suggested not only for kids but also us adults! If you might think about it, most of us have some kind of routine before we go to bed!

I work with 6 therapist that work with A LOT of kids with Mental Health Problems and that is one of the first things they suggest. They say to add in quiet time as part of that routine. I don't know about the music and radio stuff for kids but I know it all works for me! :)

Good Luck and no matter what, keep your chin up and try to be patient! Hard at the time but stay strong! :)
"A trip to the fabric store is my therapy"
User: cowqueenie
Member since: 10-30-2006
Total posts: 125
From: AndreaSews
Date: 11-21-2006, 03:56 PM (16 of 19)
CKMom, how have things been going in this dept lately? I had this problem w/ my girl when she was just turning 3. It made me insane, but we licked it. For us, the problem was some combination of Gosh-I-sure-wish-I-could-stay-up-late-and-hang-out-with-you-guys, and WOW-I-love-it-when-you're-exasperated-Mom! Oh, how she used to enjoy that cat and mouse game! I did a few things, and it did get better:
1) Offered a dim light for security.
2) A gate at the door so she could open it for security but would be "reminded" by the gate that the only place for her after bedtime was INSIDE the room.
3) Described the bedtime plan: brush teeth, use potty, jammies, ONE story, and Kiss goodnight. No visits. I asked her to please call for me in the morning.
4) I made up a visual aid to remind her of those steps in the routine (It's a hoot, and I would be happy to email it to you. She loved it.).
5) A chart with small prizes for following the plan (first all night, then all week).
6) The hard part. No visits. That means Mommy and Daddy. The little stinker has a better memory than her parents do, believe me. Nothing is as amusing as watching Mom and Dad blow it again!
User: AndreaSews
Member since: 02-18-2005
Total posts: 1007
From: ckmom002
Date: 11-21-2006, 04:14 PM (17 of 19)
its been going pretty good i started putting him in bed a little earlier and letting him watch his favorite movie then when its done if he is not asleep i put on some music and he falls asleep.... he has even been asking me before the movie is over ok mom im ready for the music. so its been going pretty good thank yall for your help!!!
User: ckmom002
Member since: 06-11-2006
Total posts: 105
From: swartzrn
Date: 11-22-2006, 11:36 AM (18 of 19)
Hi--I have a 2 1/2 year old that I never had problems getting to bed. Now she wants to stay up later and be with us (at least I think that's what is going on.) We have just had to do what all of the other ladies have suggested as far as a routine...we brush teeth, potty, etc and then say our prayers. She knows now after repitition that when we say our prayers it's time for bed. Having a routine and sticking to it seems to have been the most beneficial thing. She usually sleeps 12 hours/night so when she stays up later, I have to wake her up so she doesn't sleep half the morning. It was a little taxing on her as well. Limit naptime as well. Sarah's once 2 hour naps are now 1 hour. There is a mom at Sarah's dancing class who says that her child doesn't go to sleep until 3am every night..she then wakes up around 10am and stays awake until 3 or so the next morning..I honestly don't know how in the world she does it! She has tried everything--including establishing a strict routine.
Good luck!!
"To see the future, look into a child's eyes."
User: swartzrn
Member since: 02-17-2006
Total posts: 436
From: LoveSewin
Date: 11-24-2006, 09:25 PM (19 of 19)
With my 2 dd's I found that naps really kept them up late at that age. It also sounds like he wants to visit with you instead of sleeping. For a while our two girls (who share a room) were always calling for us. One night we decided to ignore them (since they were supposed to be sleeping). One of them finally came down the stairs to see why we didn't respond. We answered that they were supposed to be sleeping so we weren't going to go upstairs to see them. Once they figured they wouldn't get the attention, they stopped doing it (at least for about 6 months).

I think the music is a great idea. He might not feel so alone in his room with it on. The problem with watching tv is that he won't learn to fall asleep without one. Could be a challenge when he gets older if he ever sleeps away from home...

Best of luck!
User: LoveSewin
Member since: 01-31-2006
Total posts: 103
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