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Sew What’s Up Presents

The Sew What’s New Archive

This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and quilting message board “Sew What’s New,” which was retired in August 2007. It is being provided by “Sew What’s Up,” which serves as the new home for many members of “Sew What’s New.”
From: plrlegal
Date: 04-04-2003, 04:24 PM (1 of 7)
On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the other forty."

And God agreed.

On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten."

So God agreed (sigh).

On the third day, God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain 20 people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

Monkey said! , "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy. I'll give you twenty years."

Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way, man. Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back, and the ten the dog gave back, and the ten the monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."

So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family; For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.

Life has now been explained.

User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001
Total posts: 318
From: Aimee S
Date: 04-05-2003, 12:32 PM (2 of 7)
I love it I will send a copy to my father. He is 75 and he has just been forced to retirment. he is hating life. because his wife is still working she is 35 and they have three little girls he can not keep up with. they are 1, 5, 8. I told him he should get a nanny but he sits on the front porch barking at them to do this an do that and dont go there and come here come here come here.
The more you disaprove, the more fun I am having!
User: Aimee S
Member since: 02-23-2003
Total posts: 488
From: Debby215
Date: 04-05-2003, 04:36 PM (3 of 7)
That was really cute Patsy and pretty true too. Thanks for making me smile today, even though we are going to lose an hours sleep tonight...!!:bg: :bg:
So much fabric....... So little time!!
User: Debby215
Member since: 11-14-2001
Total posts: 611
From: plrlegal
Date: 04-06-2003, 12:29 AM (4 of 7)
Dh has already set our clocks up and I'm already getting off schedule. I hate daylight savings time!!!:cry: I'll just be getting used to it and the time will change back. I'll be grouchy for 3 months now. :mad:

User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001
Total posts: 318
From: bren
Date: 04-06-2003, 10:32 AM (5 of 7)

My Mom calls all of her kids every year , tells us its time to change our clock's, she think's it's her job LOL, She's a pretty neat Mom 78, :angel:

Don't let anyone ...Live Rent Free In Your Head
User: bren
Member since: 11-30-2002
Total posts: 489
From: LeapFrog Libby
Date: 04-06-2003, 01:28 PM (6 of 7)
Today is the hardest day of the year for me.. I am the original "I think I'm allergic to mornings" person.. I could not get up in time to get to church and now I really will feel bad all week...It usually takes me 3 or 4 days to adjust in the spring... The first day is always the hardest....:nervous: :nervous: :bluesad: :bluesad:
Sew With Love
User: LeapFrog Libby
Member since: 05-01-2002
Total posts: 2022
From: MissMinx
Date: 04-19-2003, 07:41 AM (7 of 7)
Well, I am there with ya. I am NOT a morning person! I HATE time change and can not cope with it, I would like to know why! But as soon as it changes back, I am as good as gold! I even wake up early (which is not normal) and when my DH brings me my cup of tea in bed - there I am, almost alive! :bg:
User: MissMinx
Member since: 02-14-2003
Total posts: 140
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