Sew What’s Up Presents
The Sew What’s New Archive
This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and
quilting message board “Sew What’s New,” which was
retired in August 2007. It is being provided by
“Sew What’s Up,”
which serves as the new home for many members of “Sew What’s New.”
From: Chrysantha
Date: 04-14-2005, 04:18 PM (1 of 9)
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1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The blockage will almost instantly be removed ! 2. Clumsy ? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing veggies by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat, by simply using the sink. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers; simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer ! 5. A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep, after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives and then you will be afraid to cough. 7. Have a bad toothache ? Smash your thumb with a hammer and you will forget about the toothache. 8. You only need two tools, WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40 If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape. 9. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. 10. Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom. 11. If you woke up breathing, Congratulations ! You get another chance ! 12. Be really nice to your family and friends, you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan. Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414 
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From: Magot
Date: 04-14-2005, 04:39 PM (2 of 9)
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Number 10 is a rule of life for me Chrys! My daughters and I are complete oportunist pee-ers. Never go past a toilet (unless, of course, you are in India).
love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us Cells a Speciality DNA to order. |
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002 Total posts: 3626 
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From: Hogmami
Date: 04-14-2005, 05:18 PM (3 of 9)
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No, never pass up a tiolet. Reminds me of potty training kids.
Carolyn
Michigan |
User: Hogmami
Member since: 09-30-2004 Total posts: 800 
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From: DorothyL
Date: 04-15-2005, 07:17 AM (4 of 9)
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Personally, I'm kinda fond of #5. Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: Magot
Date: 04-15-2005, 11:15 AM (5 of 9)
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WRT No 6. I remember years ago seeing an advert years ago in the London Underground for an ancient victorian rememdy "Johns Collis Bown's Mixture - for coughs and diarrhoea" By the way, if you have dificulty remembering how to spell diarrhoea than there is a useful mnemonic: Do It Again, Run Run Hurry Or Exploding Arse. I thank you. love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us Cells a Speciality DNA to order. |
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002 Total posts: 3626
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From: Serenity
Date: 04-15-2005, 09:02 PM (6 of 9)
Well, # 11 sounds about right  Arub "The struggle is not greater than the goal". Be blessed. Stay encouraged.
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User: Serenity
Member since: 01-12-2005 Total posts: 85 
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From: mamadus
Date: 04-18-2005, 12:24 AM (7 of 9)
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Magot... we spell that word a bit differently here in the states... no O MO 
life is too short, not to explore
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User: mamadus
Member since: 12-31-2004 Total posts: 492 
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From: Magot
Date: 04-18-2005, 12:13 PM (8 of 9)
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forgetting your greek roots again - I don't know!
love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us Cells a Speciality DNA to order. |
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002 Total posts: 3626
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From: plrlegal
Date: 04-18-2005, 06:44 PM (9 of 9)
Serenity No. 11 sounds about right for me also, however, I think I should try No. 5 some mornings!  Patsy Patsy
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User: plrlegal
Member since: 05-19-2001 Total posts: 318 |
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