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This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and
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From: Chrysantha
Date: 07-28-2005, 02:44 PM (1 of 4)
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A Dead BMW A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few mins, it's idiling smoothly. She says, "whats the story?". He replies, " just crap in the in the carburetor". She asks, " how often do I have to do that "? Speeding Ticket A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he can see her drivers license. She replied in a huff,"I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you?" Exposure A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says," Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?" She says, " Why officer?" "Because your breast is hanging out." he says. She looks down and says, " OH MY GOD, I left the baby on the bus again!" (sent by my sister...the non blonde  ) more to follow...
Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414 
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From: Chrysantha
Date: 07-28-2005, 10:05 PM (2 of 4)
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River Walk There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. " Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, " How can I get to the other side?". The second blonde looks up the river, then down the river and shouts back, " You ARE on the other side." Knitting A highway patrolman pulled along side a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled," PULL OVER", "NO the blonde yelled back,"it's a scarf". Blonde on the Sun A Russian and American and a blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "we were the first in space!". The American said," We were the first on the moon!". The blonde said "so what? We're going to be the first on the sun!" The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads." You can't land on the sun, you idiot, you'll burn up!", said the Russian. To which blonde replied, " We're NOT stupid you know, we're going at night!" In A Vacuum A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and landed on Science and Nature. Her question was, " If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, " Is it on or off ?" Finally, A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked what their names were. The blonde responded, saying that one was named Rolex and the other Timex. Her friend said, " Whoever heard of someone naming their dogs like that?" " HELLOOOOO," answered the blonde. " They're watch dogs!" 
Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414
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From: DorothyL
Date: 07-29-2005, 06:44 AM (3 of 4)
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Very funny Chrys -- especially the last. Dorothy |
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002 Total posts: 3883 |
From: ninifav
Date: 07-30-2005, 10:53 PM (4 of 4)
| hehehehe...Paula |
User: ninifav
Member since: 09-06-2004 Total posts: 204 |
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