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The Sew What’s New Archive

This archived content is from Mary Wilkins’ sewing and quilting message board “Sew What’s New,” which was retired in August 2007. It is being provided by “Sew What’s Up,” which serves as the new home for many members of “Sew What’s New.”
From: Magot
Date: 09-15-2005, 03:52 PM (1 of 8)
A panda walked into a bar. He went up to the bar and said "I'd like a steak and kidney pie and a Coke please" so the barman took his order and the panda went to sit down. Soon a waiter brought over his meal. The panda ate it up, thanked and tipped the waiter and paid the bill.

All this seemed pretty normal until the panda pulled out a gun from the depths of his fur, pulled the trigger and BANG! shot the waiter.

The barman came over and said "Wha.. wh.. You just shot my friend!!!"
the panda calmly replied "Do you know what I am?"
"Why yes," the barman answered. "You're a panda."
"Good," the panda nodded "Now go home and look up 'panda' in the dictionary." And with that, the panda walked out of the bar.

The barman was a little unsure, however he was very eager to be enlighted on the subject of his friend's murder, so he went home to find his dictionary.

After a while, he found 'panda' and quickly read the definition:

PANDA:1. A black and white bear native to China. Eats shoots and leaves.
love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us
Cells a Speciality
DNA to order.
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002
Total posts: 3626
From: DorothyL
Date: 09-15-2005, 04:02 PM (2 of 8)
Ohhhhhh...
Dorothy
User: DorothyL
Member since: 12-09-2002
Total posts: 3883
From: suesodyssey
Date: 09-15-2005, 05:21 PM (3 of 8)
A real GROANER!!!! But cute

Sue
User: suesodyssey
Member since: 03-29-2005
Total posts: 86
From: Chrysantha
Date: 09-15-2005, 11:02 PM (4 of 8)
:bg: :bg: :bg: :bg: :bg: :bg:
I love it...if my husband told that, he'd call it Ferris humor....(he's known for his bad jokes and puns...).
Chrys
User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002
Total posts: 2414
From: MaryW
Date: 09-16-2005, 08:41 AM (5 of 8)
Smacking myself in the forehead and shaking my head.
MaryW
owner/editor of Sew Whats New
User: MaryW
Member since: 06-23-2005
Total posts: 2542
From: Minabop
Date: 11-07-2005, 04:47 PM (6 of 8)
Have you all read the grammar book entitled, "Eats, Shoots and Leaves"? Really funny what a little punctuation can do.
User: Minabop
Member since: 02-01-2005
Total posts: 7
From: Magot
Date: 11-07-2005, 04:57 PM (7 of 8)
Yup, love it!
love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us
Cells a Speciality
DNA to order.
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002
Total posts: 3626
From: Hello Kitty
Date: 11-30-2005, 08:37 AM (8 of 8)
oh my what a groaner! but very funny anyway!
Lynne
aka: Hello Kitty
User: Hello Kitty
Member since: 11-29-2005
Total posts: 2
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