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From: Chrysantha
Date: 10-04-2006, 12:19 AM (1 of 2)
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> > Questions to Ponder: > 1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those > little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE > > 2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a > peeing section in a swimming pool? > > 3. OK.... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" > and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that > make the Tennessee Titans? > 4. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that > 1 enjoys it? > 5. There are three religious truths: > a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah. > b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith. > c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters. > > 6. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from > Holland called Holes? > > 7. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? > > 8. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? > > 9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just > stale bread to begin with? > > 10. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a > person who drives a racecar is not called a racist? > > 11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one? > > 12 If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it > follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, > cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry > cleaners depressed? > > 13. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? > > 14. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks? > > 15. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men? > > 16. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole > lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ...they're cramming > for their final exam. > > 17. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little > spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use - toothpicks? > > 18. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? > What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put > their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for > them while they deliver the mail? > > 19 If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly > are the others here for? > > 20. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. > > 21. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag? > > 22. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose? ! > > 23. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G? Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414 
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From: searose
Date: 10-04-2006, 01:08 PM (2 of 2)
SO FUNNY THANKS FOR THE LAUGHS---i just cried all over the keyboard i laughed so much searose
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User: searose
Member since: 09-30-2006 Total posts: 45 |
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