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From: lendube
Date: 03-16-2007, 02:26 PM (1 of 6)
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Understanding Engineers - Take One > > > > Two engineering students were walking across a university campus when one said, > > > > "Where did you get such a great bike?" > > > > The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want." > > > > The second engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway." > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Two > > > > To the optimist, the glass is half full. > > > > To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. > > > > To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Three > > > > A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. > > > > The engineer fumed, "What's with those blokes? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!" > > > > The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!" > > > > The priest said, "Here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a word with him." > > > > He said, "Hello, George! what's wrong with that group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?" > > > > The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind fire > > fighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire > > last year, so we always let them play for free anytime." > > > > The group fell silent for a moment. > > > > The priest said, "That's so sad. I think I will say a special > > prayer for them tonight." > > > > The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my > > ophthalmologist colleague and see if there's anything he can do for them." > > > > The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?" > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Four > > > > What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil > > engineers? > > > > Mechanical engineers build weapons and civil engineers build > > targets. > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Five > > > > The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?" > > > > The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" > > > > The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it > > cost?" > > > > The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with > > that?" > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Six > > > > Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the > > possible designers of the human body. > > > > One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the > > joints." > > > > Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous > > system has many thousands of electrical connections." > > > > The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil > > engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a > > recreational area ?" > > > > Understanding Engineers - Take Seven > > > > Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. > > > > Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough > > features yet. |
User: lendube
Member since: 08-06-2006 Total posts: 1548 |
From: pinecone
Date: 03-16-2007, 03:21 PM (2 of 6)
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OMG, I think I live with one of those. Now call 911, I think I cracked a rib laughing too hard. piney |
User: pinecone
Member since: 03-10-2007 Total posts: 59 |
From: Magot
Date: 03-16-2007, 04:54 PM (3 of 6)
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hahahahahahahaha...... oh , I need to change my pants....... The graduate with the Psychology degree asks " How do you feel about that?" love and kisses, Jan
Guts-R-Us Cells a Speciality DNA to order. |
User: Magot
Member since: 12-22-2002 Total posts: 3626 
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From: Chrysantha
Date: 03-16-2007, 10:35 PM (4 of 6)
LMAO !!! just what I needed today...thank you !!!
Chrys
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User: Chrysantha
Member since: 09-06-2002 Total posts: 2414 
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From: weezyrider
Date: 03-17-2007, 09:48 AM (5 of 6)
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I'm married to one!!!! The funniest story about him concerns a mount for one of my telescopes. It is a very well made mount, well designed and highly thought of. I had a technical question about the operation that I needed explained so an engineer could understand it -- the owner of the company responded "Rule #1 - DON'T LET AN ENGINEER TOUCH IT!!!! I don't let him touch sewing machines or any of my computers. I got him his own computer, and even then I have to stand there with a step by step of how to fix something. Mine's an EE, BTW. They can be totally annoying!! Weezy 
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User: weezyrider
Member since: 08-19-2003 Total posts: 218 
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From: breezy2560
Date: 03-20-2007, 06:19 AM (6 of 6)
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Why didn't you preface this with a "Please go to the potty first!!" I have laughed so hard!!! I'm married to a civil engineer, and you know what, this hits it on the head!!! They are truly a breed all their own! Debbie |
User: breezy2560
Member since: 11-11-2006 Total posts: 26 |
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